Come home to yourself

We have had a long, but insanely fast year. The days felt like months, and the months felt like minutes. Now finally things are slowing down.

You haven’t taken a vacation because there was nowhere to go. But there is a magical place to go that has been with you this entire time. Come home to the magic, wonder and awe of you this holiday season. 

When was the last time you sat down with the intention of taking some pressure off your nervous system?

This on the go, work hard / play hard world we live in is tough on us. We store energy and emotion within the body, so what is tough on your mind is tough on your body too.

Wouldn’t it feel nice to just take some pressure off?

When was the last time you simply were just present? Nothing due at a certain time, nothing you ‘should be doing’. When was the last time you were just able to be?

Coming home for the holidays may seem like a good time to do that, but the truth is, coming home is triggering. When you left after high school, you froze in your parents‘ and family’s mind just like that. They do not know the man or woman you are today, they still see you as a lost child in need of help. It’s not their fault, it’s all they know.

They are trying to put you in a space you just don’t fit in anymore, so it can feel uncomfortable. I like to imagine a scorpion moving and shaking out of her old shell that is now too small for her. 

You are the scorpion, except there is no relief of breaking out of the old shell when we meet these uncomfortable feelings with suppression. 

“I will just grit through this”

“It’s only a few days”

“This isn’t a big deal”

“I should be happy”

All of these statements are ways of suppressing our emotions. Emotions are meant to be felt, and when we numb out to them or disassociate from them, they get stored in the body.

Instead of trusting your fears and doubting your intuition, try trusting your intuition and doubting your fears.  

Ignoring your feelings does not relieve your feelings, and if you do it enough they transform into stress, chronic fatigue, feelings of overwhelm, physical pain, or burnout.  

Catch yourself “should-ing” yourself. “I should be excited to see them”, “I should be more present” “I should be able to handle this better”.

No, you shouldn’t, you should be exactly as your mind and body are asking you to be. Shoulding yourself into happiness will never work. Being with your uncomfortable feelings will bring you far closer to happiness than trying to bypass your way there ever will. 

When you hear a “should” in your head, take it as an opportunity to tune into yourself. Why is how you want to feel not aligning with how you are feeling?

What do you, and your body need?

Being gentle with yourself may make the process slow, but the process of self-discovery is not meant to be quick. Any quick healing you have heard about is not healing, it’s stress relief, and you can get the same benefits in your bathtub. It’s way cheaper and offers the same benefits of any “quick fix”. Quick fixes are not real.

Give yourself the gift of coming home to your body this season. When was the last time you felt what it was like to be you? It feels intimidating, but remind yourself you are safe. Do something to just relieve some pressure off your nervous system, even if just for a few moments. It’s a beautiful gift to give yourself.

Ways to relieve your nervous system:

• Just being: We are constantly doing. Give yourself space where your only responsibility is to be alive and be you. Literally schedule 30 minutes into your day if that’s what it takes.
• Meditation: Anytime we are leaning in and listening, our nervous system rejoices. My favorite meditation teacher is Cory Muscara, and you can find some of his meditations on Youtube.
• Dance: Connect your mind and your body so you can force your mind to be with you. Come into your body, lock yourself somewhere you won’t be disturbed, and just do your best worst dancing. 
• Yoga: If just being sounds like a big ask, put on a yoga video instead. I use Yoga With Adriene on Youtube. 
• Take a bath. Not only a great place to practice being instead of doing, but the warm water is also therapeutic for the body.